As Josine and I drove on our 40,000 mile trip round North America we sent home emails describing our adventures. Below are all the emails. We hope you enjoy reading them as much as we enjoyed writing them.
Mike and Josine, 16/04/2000.
Dear all,
At last an Internet cafe - the US seems surprisingly bereft of them.
Josine and I are both well and here is the news so far...
Left the UK on the 16th and flew to Denver "International" airport with BA. It was a really good flight but we were both a bit sad having said goodbye to Mum's, friends, etc.
Arrived safely and met Julian (Josine's brother) that evening off his flight from LA (where he'd been an usher at a friends wedding). Stayed in a motel for the night and then met Dave and Justin (2 friends of Julian's) the following day off their flight from the UK.
Then we drove up to Vail (in a TOP 7-person people carrier) hired from Hertz for some of the BEST skiing in the world. Fresh powder for the first 4 days then lovely sunny blue skies for the rest. Two friends from London (who we actually met 2 years ago in a chalet in Whistler) joined us for the last week of the Vail trip which was really nice too. Apart from Vail we also skied at Beaver Creek (great) and Breckenridge (bit dull for intermediates, but excellent for beginners). Vail resort topped the lot though.
Drove back to Denver on the 27th with "the kids" (Julian, Justin, Dave) as they had become known for Julian's 25th birthday. Tried to get tickets for an ice hockey match in Denver (not much luck) so ended up in the WORST restaurant in the world - Perkins - picture a Bernie Inn without the sophistication!!! Fantastic piss-taking opportunities to be had, and believe me we exploited them to the full - you would all be proud.
Said goodbye to the kids the next day which was all a bit tearful (Julian really is a wimp) and left the airport to return to Denver feeling a bit nervous and sick about what we were actually doing.
Spent the next 3 days in Denver looking for / buying / insuring / registering a car. After careful consideration we declined the 1969 Cadillac Hearse, and the Plymouth station wagon which broke down 100 yards from the used car dealers. We ended up buying a white 5.7 litre V8 Chevy Caprice (ex-cop car - complete with wing mirror mounted spot-lights for flushing out suspected drug dealers). So far she's (we've christened her Gertie) running great - already done 700 miles - so fingers crossed for the future.
Left Denver and headed south into New Mexico, via Colorado Springs and Cripple Creek - an ex-goldrush town now full of Casinos almost exclusively consisting of slots. Picture the overweight retired Americans glued for hours on end (eating and everything) in front of the machines - America the Beautiful.
Then a 400 mile drive to Santa Fe in New Mexico. Santa Fe and the surrounding area (Taos, Espanola, Chimayu) are all lovely. Amazing cowboy film scenery and a great climate. Have spent a very enjoyable 4 days in the area (even saw a native-American buffalo dance at a nearby pueblo).
Writing this email in a very hippyish bookstore in Espanola before heading north-west to the Mesa Verde / G. Canyon / Hoover Dam / Las Vegas, and eventually down to San Diego to meet Andrew, Tina, Kate (friends of Josine's from St. Andrews).
Hope all are well and we look forward to hearing your news via email.
Lots of love, Michael and Jose.
Dear All,
A quick update on our progress....After New Mexico we had a rather manic week - in the space of 5 days we visited the Mese Verde, Monument Valley, Grand Canyon, Las Vegas and Death Valley!!! All of them were spectacular but the lasting memory was walking right down into the the Grand Canyon and up again in a day - I'm not joking when I say it nearly killed us - we literally could not walk for a day and it took almost a week before we both stopped limping - and as for Michael - those of you who know how much he enjoys walking (not) will belive me when I say he still has not let me forget that I made him do it.
We then spent about 3 days in LA - Bugsy and Aimee (friends of my brothers) kindly let us stay with them and we had a really pleasent couple of days in LA. I have to say it really was quite a relief reaching LA after almost a month away from any major cities. Small town America is very nice but you do meet some strange people - for example the guy we met in Death Valley who had driven 24 hours non stop from Vancouver to spend 9 days in a crappy motel in Death Valley where there is really nothing other than sand dunes and salt flats - we could not belive that he had by passed the whole of the California coast to come here!!
After LA we went straight down to San Diego where we met up with Tina, Kate and Andrew [friends of Josine's from St. Andrews - ed]. Andrew lives in SD and Tina and Kate [friend of Josine's - ed] flew in from England on hols. Andrew (not always known for his organisation skills) surpassed all expectations and had booked a weekend at a beach house about 80 miles down the Mexican coast - it was idyllic (Shatts - I thought of you - the lobster was amazing). We then spent about another week just in San Diego - it is such a fantastic city - I think it is possibly our favourite US city (after New York) - it seems to have everything - wonderful beaches, great restaurants etc.
Mike takes over here to speed things up.
Left SD couple of days ago. Headed 100 miles east to the Anza Borrega desert state park. Lots of cactus and very hot. Last night we arrived in Palm Springs (holiday homes of the rich and famous) and a bit crap. Today we're off to Santa Barbara. All good fun.We're both well and the car is still running which is a bonus. I am getting a bit of a belly and can't use my cutlery anymore. I also shout very loudly when conversing with people 2 feet away from me and I never listen to their replies. I never say please, but ALWAYS say thank you. And why have a private chat when you can share your inermost thoughts WITH THE WHOLE ROOM. I stick my finger up at passing motorists. Chew beef jerky until my gums bleed. Am buying a shotgun tomorrow and may just use it god darn'. I am going slowly insane.
Lots of love, Michael and Jose.
ps. SEND US YOUR NEWS. Please.
Dear all,
Thanks for all the news, it was good to hear that all is well with everyones various plans for the future.
Jose and I are almost at the end of section 1a, subsection b of phase 1 of our plan (aka up the west coast whilst arguing voluminously about map reading skills - or lack of). Can you tell I'm in a library OR WHAT.
Anyway, we think the last time we sent a BIG email was San Diego, so here's what's happened in between.
Left SD and headed east to the Anza Borrega desert (sandy and hot - I got it a bit sweaty a couple of times), then to palm springs (which was shut). After out mini inland adventure we decided the coast was for us, so back to route 1 and Santa Barbara (where we met Tina and Kate who took us to a terrible Pizza restaurant and then refused to stay out late and get drunk with me). We did drive through SB in a convertible playing the Beach Boys at volume=MAX, but all the hep dudes just laughed at us.
From SB north to San Luis Obispo and found a drive-in cinema. Film (The Matrix) was OK, and I think I got to 3rd base with Jose, but can't be sure as all the lights were off - it could have been the butter popcorn I suppose.
Then to Big Sur (or more appropriately Big Rain) for a night in a sodden tented cabin - a bit depressing really. So...We decided to whizz up to San Francisco and stayed there 9 nights with George and Kay (friends of friends from Elstree) who (once again) were lovely to us and showed us a good time. SF is now our favourite US city (again), but things change.
Finally left SF about a week ago and have headed (a bit too quickly) through north California and Oregon - a shame to have missed so much of Southern Oregon as it looked lovely as we drove past it at 54.3mph (the speed I have calculated to give us a Chevy's max fuel efficiency of 21 mpg). We got a new starter motor in SF too, for those of you following the car saga closely.
And so we find ourselves in Portland which is a really nice, laid back city with very few tourist attractions, so we have just wandered and eaten, and relaxed. We also went to Mnt St. Helens today - it didn't erupt.
Plan now is to carry on North to Seattle where we are meeting Josine's Mum (and brother a bit later) and we are all going to Vancouver island for a weeks R&R from this hectic holiday schedule. After that we have made an executive decision that driving the 1,500 mile Alaska highway to Anchorage might be a giggle and then maybe the boat back. We'll see.
Anyway, that's a quick resume thus far.
Love, Michael and Josine.
ps. John/Esme, we will reply to you tomorrow re plans etc and will email you asap - expect to hear from us in next 24 hrs.
Dear all,
Well it's about time for another of these long tedious updates which we KNOW you really look forward to.
We're now in Vancouver, Canada. It's really lovely here. Weather's great (the Canadians seem very surprised) and we are getting 2.4 CAD's to the GBP (can any accountants (or Financials users) out there confirm that CAD is the currency_code (note intentional underscore) for the Canadian dollar. TravelExpenses.xls DEPENDS on knowing this information.
Anyway, what have we been up to (I hear you ask). Well since Portland, Oregon we have travelled east through the Columbia Gorge. Then north through Washington (State) to Seattle. Then a ferry across the US/Canada border to Victoria, Vancouver Island (capital of British Columbia) for one night and then Pacific Rim National Park for 10 days. Lastly a ferry over here to Vancouver itself. My favourite bits follow (Jose has just gone to the loo (AGAIN) so you know it'll be juicy - READ ON...
1. Columbia Gorge, Oregon. Summary - Big gorge with river. Camped for 5 nights in a sulphur spring "resort". Spent the first 3 days wondering what the eggy smell was in all the restaurants we went to, before realising it was me. In Hood River we went to another drive-in (I'm opening one when we get home) and were treated to a group of pre-pubescent US females performing their rendition of a Spice Girls hit - in their underwear (Jose tells me they were actually PJ's).
2. Glendale, Washington. Went to a really great amateur observatory. All the rangers were so very enthusiastic about all the stars we would see, so were a bit mystified when they couldn't focus on any star in the sky. The chief observor then wondered if they might have more luck if they took off the LENS CAP!!! Double-Duh.
3. Ellensdale, Washington. Josine communicated with chimps. She really did. They loved her (she hadn't shaved her legs for a couple of weeks though). University of Washington is a world leader in Chimp-Human communication using ASL (American Sign Language), which is like British Sign Language but with extra signs for Cool, Dude, RightOn, etc.
4. Seattle, Washington. Summary - COOOFFFFFEEEEEE. The home of Microsoft & Starbuck's was TOP. A really happening city (although we were in bed when most of the happening was going on). Josine's Mum flew out for a couple of weeks visit (to see if we were changing our underwear regularly). AND THEN there was the shopping. Apparently you can't possibly go round the world without clogs (although the Dutch have been telling us that for centuries). Other must haves are linen trousers (we already had two pairs), tee-shirts (when you have 12 what's another couple). Also very in vogue are capri pants (I have discovered recently), Josine assures me that these particular ones are bear repellent for Alaska so I'm sure it was (MY) money well spent. Maybe I should get a pair too. Seattle's a lovely city, great setting and a lot going on.
5. Victoria, BC. Summary - Nice Day For It (VERY British). Red busses, telephone boxes, policemen with our helmets (but awful PVC uniforms). I almost started driving on the left when we came off the ferry. Visited some flowers. Had salmon. Slept above a knicker shop. It was GREAT.
6. Pacific Rim National Park. West coast of Vancouver Island. Grey Whales, Killer Whales, Bears (in the road), Bald Eagles, Osprey, Sea Stars, Anemones, Harbour Seals, Mussels and Clams. And we went in a sea plane and followed whales from 300 feet. Some of the muddiest walks I've ever done. The house we stayed in was wonderful with windows over a vast sandy beach and our very own lighthouse flashing into the bedroom all night. We were there for 7 night but extended to 10 because it was so lovely. Big thank-you to our sponsor, Mrs. T.
7. Then Julian turned up. Tired and on crutches. Came for a week to find peace and tranquility to write up his PhD. Unfortunately he had knackered his foot playing football. Which is exactly what his foot looked like. Highlight of my week with Julian was obtaining an all-terrain, manually assisted (we think this is American for pushed) wheelchair (in fluorescent yellow) in which we shoved and heaved him down an enormous beach in the middle of a driving rainstorm.
8. Vancouver, BC. Lovely setting. Cheap. Friendly. Last Monday we went to our first Rodeo. Lots of macho men falling off of horses and bulls. Sometime intentionally, sometimes not. No major injuries to report, but the final bull rider of the day got helicoptered over his bull's horns through about 720 degrees. Cool...Dude.
9. Coming highlight. Intl Rugby (Jose is very excited). Canada v Samoa next Saturday here in Vancouver. I'm expecting a lot of knock-ons.
And that's about your lot for now. We're off to plan Alaska, Jose has her Capri pants at the ready.
Love to all, Michael and Jose.
ps. SEND US YOUR NEWS...
Hello everyone,
Time for another missive so delete here if you cannot bear to read another one.
Well we've done it! We have driven the Alaska Highway from start to finish (over 1500 miles but we actually did it in reverse) at a speedy 45 miles an hour and survived. Gertie (the car) has an official "I drove the Alaska Highway and survived" certificate blue tacked proudly to her rear screen for all to admire.
It was quite an adventure, but the highlights were as follows (you made need your Alaska and Northern Canada maps):
From Vancouver we made our way up to Prince Rupert in BC and from there took the Alaska Marine Highway all the way up to Skagway (no rude jokes please but the official name for this route is "The Inside Passage"!). We stopped for a couple of nights at Ketchikan and Juneau which can only be reached by boat or plane, and then on to Haines and Skagway. The boat ride was fabulous - we were lucky and had clear weather pretty much all the way and saw sunsets like you've never seen. From Skagway we drove up into the Yukon in Canada to Dawson City - an old gold mining town complete with gambling hall, dusty streets and boardwalks. From here we were planning to drive the 'Top of the World Highway' and then up to Fairbanks but I got one of my stupid ideas - you can imagine how Michael's heart sank when I decided that we were going to do a little side trip and drive 400km (800km round trip) on a gravel road in our 10 year old 2 wheel drive car just to get our photo taken at the Arctic Circle!! Well, the Alaska Highway was easy in comparison to this. We couldn't go faster than 35 mph which made for a very long journey with Michael cursing me most of the way. Still we managed it only losing 2 tyres (we were lucky - we met one car which had had 8 flat tyres on the same route), and I think even Michael agrees that it was worth every moment. The entire journey was above the treeline through artic tundra - it has to be the most remote country we have ever seen.
After that little detour we did finally drive the 'top of the world highway' and on into Fairbanks. We Arrived in Fairbanks for the summer solstice weekend and thought it would be fun to go and cheer the locals at the start of the annual 10k 'midnight sun run' around the city. Well we arrived at the starting point about half an hour before the start of the race and I don't quite know what happened but the next thing I knew we were in shorts and official 'Midnight Sun Run' T shirt on the starting line ready to go. We had done fairly minimal exercise for the last 4 months so I won't go into the state we were in a hour later when we finished. Put it this way we got up the next morning a drove to some hot springs where we spent the day soothing our sore muscles - it turned out that most of the runners had the same idea so the springs were fairly busy!! However we did meet a lovely fellow runner - Brooke who invited us to stay with her when we got to Anchorage.From Fairbanks we went to Denali National Park - more wilderness and loads of wild life - definitely my favourite part of the trip to Alaska. It is also right by Mt McKinley the highest point in North America - so as Michael proudly pointed out we have been to the lowest point (Death Valley) and the highest points on the continent!
After Fairbanks we went West to the Kenai Peninsula where we celebrated Michael's 30th birthday - I think the highlight of his day was seeing puffins for the first time!
We then went to Anchorage for a couple of days to stay with Brooke - the weather was wonderful and we both really liked Anchorage (compared to Fairbanks which we were not too taken with). Perhaps the best thing though was having some lovely home cooked food and a proper bed to sleep in - thank you so much Brooke!
From Anchorage we took a boat past the Columbia Glacier (quite exciting watching the boat weave through some fairly large icebergs - at some points you could almost touch the icebergs from the boat) to Valdez and then started the long journey down the Alaska Highway. It has taken us the best part of a week to drive it but actually the road was not that bad (compared to the arctic circle scenario!).
We are now back in civilisation at least it feels like it (we are back to flush toilets in the campgrounds) we are in Jasper in the Rockies heading to Calgary for the stampede at the weekend - largest rodeo in North America (apparently). From there it is back into the US and we start the trek across to the East coast.Please keep all your news coming our way
Love
Josine and Michael
Michael's Bit Below (MBB)
Dear all,
The above took 3.5 hours to type. I could have done it faster with my nose.
Anyway, all above is true...PLUS...
1) Michael is now 30. He got an Alaska bookmark. A big kiss. And the chance to buy himself a VERY expensive boat trip to see puffins. Top.
2) We are now major subrscribers to "BowHunting" magazine. The journal for the discerning archer. I am about to buy some ointment to make me smell like a female caribou in heat, and a large, padded chair which can be strapped 50 feet up a tree for optimum wildlife shooting. It's great, no really. Jose says I'm only allowed to fire arrows with plastic suckers on the tips. I think she misses the point.
Not allowed to write any more as we are running out of time.
Hope all well. Congrats to Cygnet novices who aren't anymore. Well done to all about to or have got married. Have to go now to plan October trip to Churchill, Hudson Bay, to be massacred by 3,000 marauding polar bears. Expect something at the end of the 9 o'clock news.
Rgds, (love to Tina) Mike.
Dear all,
WE ARE STILL ALIVE.
Sorry for the long delay, lot to write, so...
Last wrote in Jasper (we think) in early July. From there we headed south through Lake Louise, Bannf (or maybe Banff (or maybe Bannff)). The weather couldn't decide whether to rain, snow, sleet or blow so most of the time it just compromised by doing all 4 (not great). We did however WALK ON A GLACIER and Jose drank some glacial water (all her wrinkles just dropped away - just like in "She").
Then to the Calgary Stampede - "the greatest outdoor show on earth" - apparently. We saw lumberjacks, $50,000 rodeo, chuck wagon racing, drank beer while watching Shania Twin (Twain Tribute). We have never seen so many cowboy hats in our lives. Jose bought a very fetching cowgirl bandana which she has become very attached to and now refuses to remove. I have to get up at 0300 to put it in the laundry while she's asleep. (She wants to be a cowgirl (when she grows up) - apparently it's a very hard 3 years training before becoming a Chartered Cowgirl).
Then we went all Jurasic at Dinosaur Provincial Park, Alberta. There we encountered Jed, officially the "best park ranger in North America" (believe me we've met a lot of park rangers). He was late 20's, balding, with a beard-only (for those of you that know what that is), but he was great (you bet) and we just followed him round like a couple of schoolgirls at a Take That concert. Pretty amazing park. We went on walks where you had to tiptoe between the dinosaur bones. One of the highlights of the trip so far. Jose then decided to become a paleontologist, again another 4 years of work before they will Charter you. Or is that yachts.
Then south, back into the good old US of A. We decided that the best way to cross the border was for Jose to speak to the immigration man, and for me to keep my mouth shut - apparently I rub them up the wrong way because I'm never sure where I am, where I've been, where I'm going, who I am, or how long I'll be there - Jose says this might look a bit suspicious - and she thinks my optimal state is "mouth shut, credit card out". We re-entered into Montana and headed south along the longest straightest road in the world - really. Stopped overnight in Glacier National Park and celebrated Christmas in July, complete with carols and a tree. You could paint your own cookies (American for biscuit) with coloured (colored) icing. I did a lovely smiley face and Josine's effort was just plain rude!
Then to Yellowstone, Wyoming. Saw Old Faithful go off and lots of other thermal features (geysers, fumeroles, hot springs, and mudpots). The hot springs had bacteria mats in them, colours (colors) changing depending on the water temperature, so they looked like bright rainbows radiating from the hottest water at the centre (center), to the coolest at the edges. Very pretty. Did some good walks and watched a lot of idiots _almost_ pat the grizzlies. Very busy, but an amazing place. You can see why Theo Roosevelt named it the first National Park (see I have learned something).
Then to Deadwood City, South Dakota (home of Calam' and Bill Hickock), and the Black Hills. Went to the evening program at Mount Rushmore and watched the Americans there at their patriotic best, really belting out "Oh say, can you see" with gusto. Impressive. The statues themselves are amazing, and they've just opened a new multi-squillion dollar visitor centre (center) which was very impressive. Less impressive was Crazy Horse, the Native American counterpart nearby. When finished it will be an enormous monument to him with arm outstretched riding a horse (carved from a WHOLE MOUNTAIN). At the moment it seems to be just a nose, and I'm sure I could see a dewdrop forming.
Next to Badlands National Park, South Dakota. Did a night "prowl" where I was the only person to fall over in the mud. The ranger told us a ghost story half way round, we didn't sleep too well that night. The Badlands were pretty bad, baking hot and no shade anywhere, but the scenery was very impressive. Called the Badlands because the first travelers across called the land "les mauvaises terres a traverser" or in Michael French "Less Moo-Vace Terry's ay Traverse-er". Bisous.
Then on to Alliance, Nebraska. Home of CARhenge, a superb recreation of STONEhenge with, erm, cars. Done during a family reunion. Jose and I agree that they must have all been pissed.
Then a long, Long, LONG drive across Nebraska on scenic highway #2. Stopped briefly in Lincoln, the state capital. Most US capital buildings are very impressive. Gold domes and fancy marble are not uncommon. In Nebraska they dance to the beat of a different drum. The nickname for the capital building is "the penis of the prairies" and it does look remarkably like a very large todger. Very well done Nebraska (we say). (Worth the 200 mile detour just to get a photo - [ed]).
On to Omaha, Nebraska. First "big" city for a while. Had THE BEST INDIAN MEAL IN THE US here at the Indian Oven (I know how to show Jose a good time). Also home to ConAgra - Omahaians seemed very proud of this, we didn't really understand.
Next to Iowa, and the State Fair. By my official reckoning we laughed from 1800 on 11 August to 0900 on the 13th without stopping. First we watched the parade through Des Moines on the evening of the 11th. The 200(!) floats took nearly 3 hours to go past, and each was better than the last. There really were 76 trombones, and 110 cornets close behind (also rows and rows of the finest virtuo... I'll stop now). Highlight HAD TO BE Miss Iowa Pork 1999 - she was resplendent.
The State Fair itself started the next day. We had hotdog-on-a-stick, terriyaki-on-a-stick, cajun-chicken-on-a-stick, and our personal favourite, cheese-on-a-stick. We watched the Ladies Chicken Calling competition then the Rooster Crowing competition, very hotly contested. The highlight of the fair was the BUTTER COW, a one ton (tonne) lifesize ruminent in butter (unsalted we think). It was complete right down to the veins on it's udders. Alongside the butter cow sat a life size sculpture of Christ at the last supper (again in butter) - we couldn't decide if this was in bad taste or not. The Fair's catchphrase was "Knock Yourself Out", and all day we watched Iowans trying to do just that in the Bud tent. Also saw a 1097 lb pig (hog). It was the biggest pig (hog) we have ever seen, bit like a small carthorse.
Stopped briefly in Grinnell, Iowa, to pay homage.Visited the Herbert Hoover birthplace near Iowa City (we know all about Hoover now - go on, ask us a question). Then spent a blissful three days with the Vorthman family in Freeport, Illinois. We had met them as we travelled round Alaska, and they had unwisely invited us to stay as we headed east. We had home grown corn, local beer, and chocolate malts made by (officially) the world's greatest soda jerk. I was also lucky enough to be beaten at Go Fish, Battleships, Rummy, Sorry, Dominoes (normal and "chicken foot"), and Memory Game by 6 year old Taylor. Thanks again to Marlene, Ev, Dawn, and Tori - and to Taylor, I shall have my revenge.
Then to Madison and Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Apparently Wisconsin has more overweight people than any other state in the US. There was one more when I entered. No sign of the Fonz in Milwaukee, but we spent an enjoyable afternoon at the Miller Brewery, hic.
Then to Chicago for what turned into an 8 day stay. Great place. Went on some interesting architecture tours (Jose now to be an architect). I know all about Chicago Windows, Modernism, Post-Modernism, but am particularly hot in and around Echo-Deco. Found another Cheesecake Factory which was exciting. Walked the Miracle Mile (Bond St). Saw the Chicago Air and Water show (complete with Thunderbirds - the US Red Arrows - Latest, Jose to be Fighter Pilot upon return). There was a US Marines chin-up competition - I didn't want to embarass them. Went to the Art Institute, highlight the Thorne Miniatures, 1/12 scale models of room interiors from around the world. Also to the Field Museum (on a very rainy afternoon), Chicago's natural history museum. There was a very good Africa exhibit, complete with Dik Diks. On our last day we went to Wrigley Field to watch the Cubs v the SF Giants (baseball - rounders for podgy men in leotards). Final score was 10-11 to the Cubs (apparently they hardly ever win). The ground was packed (on a Thursday afternoon) and the weather was great, and they brought beer and hotdogs to your seat, so all seemed right with the world. We even saw Sammy Sosa hit a home run. We loved the baseball. Jose to now coach professional baseball upon return.
ALSO, we went on a bit of a McDonald's frenzy in Chicago as this is where they plan their global empire. Went to the first ever McD's in Des Plaines (Chicago suburb) and then for a look at GHQ. Jose wouldn't get out of the car. Best bit was the McShuttle which seems to run between the McOffices and McStation. Both had Big Macs, Fries, Milkshakes, and Pies to celebrate (Mike's SuperSized) - felt sick afterwards. Jose now to be McDonald's accountant upon return.
Now on our way east to Detroit (Joe Louis Fist (for Esther), Henry Ford Museum, Black American's Museum) and Cleveland (Rock and Roll Hall of Fame).
Upcoming highlights - Sep 18, Miss America (will try to pass Jose off as Miss UK and so gain entry to changing rooms), and in Oct honeymooning and polar bears on Hudson Bay.Lastly, some stats...
17 - US States Covered
2 - Canadian Provinces
1 - Canadian Territory
463 - Number of Dairy Queen Breezes Jose has eaten
17,500 - Miles Gertie has done
Hope all are well. For those of you in NY and DC, KNOW THAT WE AREN'T VERY FAR AWAY.
Lots of Love, Mike and Jose.
p.s. Send us your news (or make some up).
Dear all,
Well, can you believe that the last missive was on 28/08/99 (08/28/99 for any Americans out there, and 92/88/09 for the dyslecsicks). So here it is, from the Nation's Capital (Capitol?), whatever.
We are staying for an unspecified number of days with Esther and Terence Curry. Jose lived for a year with Esther whilst doing her 5-year French degree - a necessary prerequisite for Chartered Accountancy, not. Esther has now married an American who works for the US State Dept. She is currently feverishly learning the words to the star spangled banner and practising her pronounciation of the word herb.
So the last time we mailed we were in Indiana. Since then...
Detroit. Motor City. Home of Motown. Henry Ford Museum. Black-American History. Motown Museum.
Cleveland. Home of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. We entered at 10:00 and eventually left at about 20:00. This counts as our longest museum visit thus far, it was very, very good. A real must for you late 20's early 30's crowd out there - you know who you are.
Saratoga for Labor (Labour) Day. Went to the races on a blisteringly hot day with every intention of winning back the entire cost of our holiday thus far. Didn't.
From there we headed up into New England for the Fall (Autumn) Colors (Colours). We were a bit early, but enjoyed cycling in Acadia National Park, and stuffing our faces with ice cream at the Ben and Jerry's factory tour in Stowe VT.
Headed south along the New England coast, through (thru) Salem Mass, home of the infamous witch trials of <some-date-here>. Lots of witch museums, witches hats, and witches broomsticks for sale. Witchever way you turned there was something with a witch theme witch started to ittitate after a while. Witch.
American Revolution. Concord and Lexington. Had lunch in a prison in Concord. $2.80 for 3 courses for 2 people. Some of the biggest b******s I have ever seen served us. I left a big tip.
The New England State(s) fair in Springfield, Mass. Maple syrup, lobster, apple tarts, Ben and Jerry's, apple cider, toffee apples, beer, a country singer called Chris LeDoux who seems to be known for his crotch - several people took very close-up photos of it anyway. Jose remarked that he was sexy, but what does she know anyway.
New York, New York. Ten nights in our very own apartment on the upper east side. We lived like kings, although the bed was perhaps a little too firm for our liking. Thanks to the Witton's for the accomodation. NY was NY. Manic, loud, crowded, excellent. Highlight were a trip to Brighton Beach (Da), walking tours of Harlem and the Lower East Side (Jewish History), and some excellent Soul Food at the Shark Bar.
Here She is, Miss America. 18/09, Atlantic City NJ. Jose, myself and Mr. Kissane took a trip to see who would be crowned the last Miss American of the Millenium. Alan lost interest after Miss Iowa was rejected early on, but Jose and I scored the whole thing in a very professional manner. We had Miss TX as a runaway winner. The judges didn't agree and gave it to Miss KT (the first ever Miss America with short hair). I can only reason that they didn't use bino's during the swimsuit contest (as we did). Americana at its best.
Back up to Boston to stay with friends of Mr Kissane who had never actually met us (some people might say that's a distinct advantage). Anyway, as normally happened, they loved Jose and tolerated me. Two nights in Boston rapidly turned into five nights as Jose and I pretended that we couldn't hear the "well you tell them to leave, no you tell them to leave" that took place before we entered the room. Charlie and Kate were very kind, and very long-suffering. You would think that in a beautiful historical city like Boston our highlights would be historical or architectural. No. Charlie and Kate took us on a leaf-peeping hike on the Sunday of our stay. My highlight for Boston was the rucksack we packed for this trip. We packed for the final assault on Kilimanjaro...including (my personal favourite) a small plastic trowel.
Newport RI. Very, very cool. We stayed with a US Navy Commander (James Bond is a Royal Navy Commander), and got a behind-the-scenes peek at the Navy College in town. Rhode island is one of the smallest states in the union but, apparently, has the most Dunkin' Donuts per capita in the country - as you can see we're not wasting our time over here.
Philadelphia. Josine was 29 in Philadelphia. She got a US cook book, and had Happy Birthday sung to her in a bar full of plastered Philadelphians. I think that got her back nicely for the puffins/bookmark on my birthday. Five days in Philadelphia passed in a drunken haze. I do remember running up the "Rocky" steps outside the Art Institute, having a Philly Cheesesteak s/w, and a local delicacy called S**t-on-a-Shingle for breakfast. Everything else is a blur. Thank you to Lisa (from Alaska) for the accomodation.
From Philly we headed north to Niagara and met Krista and Dave, friends from the UK, who had just got married, and were honeymooning in Ontario. Did the Niagara sights. Got wet, drunk, etc. and headed up to Toronto with them to start our big Hudson Bay trip to see...
Also stopped in Buffalo and tried Buffalo Chicken Wings at the Anchor Bar (where they were invented, apparently). Ran the whole gamut, from medium, to medium-hot, to hot, without any ill effects. Then we had the suicidal, just for a larf. We didn't.
...Polar Bears. Caught the Trans-Canadian in Toronto for a 10-day trip up to Churchill, Manitoba to see the polar bears. Every October they come to Churchill and wait for the Hudson Bay to freeze so they can go out onto the ice and hunt seal. A 3-day train ride from Toronto through to Winnipeg and then north got us to Churchill in the middle of a snow storm. It was freezing. We did 2 days of Tundra Buggy Tours. Large "coaches" on 8 huge inflatable tyres that drive across the tundra in search of bears. There were a lot of bears. We were able to see a mother nursing, big males fighting, a recent seal kill being eaten by a mother and her cubs. A really amazing trip. 4 days back down to Toronto were enlivened by a new friend from the West Country (who had decided to park his tractor for a couple of weeks and come over) who had a video camera. I may have a future in film. If anyone ever does this trip (and we would highly recommend it), when eating on the train DO NOT, EVER, have the Prairie Platter.
Then into Civil War mode with a long days drive down from Toronto to...
Gettysburg. Harpers Ferry. Antietam. All very good. Antietam was our favourite. The battle here was the bloodiest single day of the war, and the ranger who took us for a two-hour auto-tour brought the whole thing to life.
...and so you find us in DC doing museums and monuments. 23,000 miles done, and a few more to go. Hope all are well.
Send us your news, Michael and Jose.
Dear all,
Well the last email was rubbish (apparently). Not only did Josine chastise me, but I was also humbled by a couple of professional writers (see bottom of p60 of the current New Woman magazine - US edition only I guess). I have resolved to TRY HARDER, and in this spirit am (a) keeping ongoing notes in peep-peep; (b) sending more frequent missives; (c) am not allowed to send anything until She has checked it. So here goes nothing...
VIRGINIA
Left DC after a really nice weekend under a bit of a cloud. It cost us $240 to extend our whizz-bang 6-month visas (which had already cost us $90 in Toronto). What can you do. So we filled in all the forms got a money order and sent it all off. Then left DC. On the way out we stopped at the Frederick Douglass National Historic Site and for a short time in Alexandria where we went up the tower of the Masonic Temple of which George Washington was the top banana (or whatever the Masons call their supreme wizard). It had a slanting elevator shaft which was interesting in an architectural sort of way.
Presidential homes next. Mount Vernon, and Monticello ("a small cherry?", "a Count - falsely imprisoned?". No it actually means small mountain, or actually Big Hill if you are forced to lumber up it).
MV was home to GW, and MC was Jefferson's home. We both preferred MC. Jefferson was a real inventor in the nutty professor vein, with weather vains, dumb waiters, revolving serving doors, etc. He planned the University of Virginia from here and would watch its construction in nearby Charlottesville via a hole he had cut in the trees near the house. UVA have nice rugby shirts. I wasn't allowed to buy one.
Back to Civil War mode at Appomattox Court House where Lee surrendered the North VA army to Grant to effectively end the Civil War. We did a 6 mile "Boy Scout" hike answering 22 questions as we went for our History badge. We didn't do too well and failed to be awarded the badge.
Petersburg for another battlefield and our first southern BBQ. Pulled pork, collard greens, mashed potato(e), and sweet potato(e) with added sugar and baked marshmallow on the top. Oh yeah, and lots and lots of lard. Made a small side trip to Wakefield, aka (as you know) the Peanut Capital of the WORLD. Luckily we timed it just right for their Annual Peanut Harvest Festival. We enjoyed a guided tour of the first peanut museum in the world from a real peanut farmer called Benny who got very excited when he discovered we weren't from Virginia. He showed us plants, tools, by-products, and a machine which actually shucked the peanuts in front of our very eyes. All fab, and I broke most of my front teeth on home-made brittle too.
Richmond VA. Capital of the Confederacy. LOTS of monuments. ALL facing south. They really are still fighting the war down here. Very good museum of the Confederacy, plus a tour of their White House, where Davis lived for his four years as president. Then we went all Colonial.
Williamsburg is an entire town preserved and run as it would have been in the Colonial period. We were a bit worried it would be rather tacky, but it was very well done. Jamestown, one of the first sites settled by the English (hoorah). Then Yorktown, site of the final decisive battle of the Revolution (boo). We left Virginia here. One of the most interesting states we have been to. Recommended for Colonial, Revolutionary, and Civil War history; a taste of Southern cooking; and lovely Fall colours too. Yea VA.
NORTH CAROLINA
First in Flight. To Kill Devil Hills (aka Kitty Hawk, the name of its nearest post office). December 17 1903 and Orville had lift-off, His take off point is marked by a large boulder and the site of his "landing" by another. He flew for 12 seconds and covered 120 feet. Now we can send OAP's (seniors) into space. Orville died young, but Wilbur lived long enough to see Chuck break the sound barrier which I think is pretty amazing. One of the most inspiring places we have been to, considering it consists of nothing more than a monument and a sand hill in a sandy field.
GO WEST...TO TENNESSEE
1,000 mile drive across NC into Tennessee to meet my Mum and Dad for a 10 day tour of the state. On the way we decided to drive a section of the Blue Ridge parkway. An exposed ridge, we were told that the weather could change rapidly at that time of year. We started the drive in sunshine and finished it at around milepost 357.5 in a freezing rain storm nose down in a ditch with armed park rangers, flashing blue lights, and the biggest tow truck I've ever seen. $100 later we were back on our way, saying a small prayer. The only damage to Gert was a dented hubcap. Jose was driving. I was magnanimous. We got off the BR Parkway soon after that.
Stopped briefly in Chattanooga, home of the Choo-Choo, but also home of the International Towing and Recovery Hall of Fame! Fascinating exhibits covering, for example, wheel-clamps - then and now. Another battlefield too! Also stopped for the night in Savannah TN (not the famous Georgia one) where we happened on a youth theatre group production of Little Women. They were so excited about having us in that the director got up on the stage before the play started to welcome us as their first International Audience. I was about to break into a rousing rendition of GStQ (in a monotone voice), but the lights went down.
Met Mum and Dad in Memphis and commenced a whistle stop tour. Encompassing Graceland; Mississsippppi boat tour; Beale St; the Peabody Ducks (who descend from their Penthouse suite to the foyer fountain at 1100 every day; National Civil Rights Museum; Shiloh (single bloodiest day of the Civil War); a Botel (a boat motel); Mammoth Cave National Park (actually in KY - home of Miss America 2000); Nashville; Grand Ole Opry; Wild Horse Saloon; Opryland Hotel Xmas Lights - AMAZING; Stones River Battlefield; Pinson Mounds - ancient Indian burial and ceremonial mounds. Phew.
Then the visa extension stuff started. The Kissane family (Georgia Branch) had kindly offered (been coerced) into being our mailing address for the extension project. So three weeks after mailing the original application it was returned with a "this should have been sent to Texas" note inside it. It was sent immediately to Texas, and Jose and I immediately started to panic about the legality of our status after 4/12/99 (12/4/99) when our original visas were due to run out. We resolved to go to the Memphis INS office to "sort it art" [sic.]. There we found the only nice person working on an INS front desk ANYWHERE in the US. She smiled and was courtious and polite not only to us, but to all the other Johnny Foriegners waiting to be processed. After I had picked Jose up and we had wasted 5 minutes looking for Jeremy Beadle, we explained our predicament. She told us not to worry as the processing of a 6 month tourist visa extension request actually takes about 250 days. So hopefully we will receive a yes or no decision some time in August 2000. By which time Jose should be well on her way to becoming CEO of one kind of fast food empire or another. We will have been home for approaching 6 months!
God Bless America.
MISSOURI
Mum and Dad left and Jose and I headed north to St Louis (pronounced Lewis (OK Alan?)) for Thanksgiving. EVERYTHING was shut - even McD's, which amazed (and pleased) us both. Fortunately we found a supermarket in the morning and were able to have turkey sandwiches and pumpkin pie in our cruddy $30 motel room. Which was nice. The next day St Louis (Lewis) reopened. The centrepiece to the Jefferson National Expansion Museum is a 430 foot stainless steel arch. You can see it wherever you are in the city and it really gives an impressive feel to the whole place. You ascend it in tiny 5-person cubicles which rotate to keep you upright as you move upward along the curve of the arch. The view from the top is great, the relief when you get to the ground is better.
ILLINOIS (briefly)
Side trip back to Illinois to see Cahokia Mounds. More Indian mounds, but these represent the largest prehistoric structures in North America. A very good visitors centre and walking tour, but probably the most impressive thing about the site itself is the mural depicting how this vast city looked at its height around 1200AD.
ARKANSAS
Made Jose drive late into the night just so that we could stay in a town called Bald Knob, AK. When we eventually found a motel, the owner turned out to be from Wembley!
Hot Springs AK. 28th November 1999. We camped - aren't we brave? I nearly succumbed to exposure but managed to make it through the night. Jose had a lovely hot spring bath this morning, I had a wash in cold water. And so here we are. Little Rock. We have already been to see the Little Rocks and are now on our way to do a Bill Clinton kind of walk thing. Then on to Mississippi.
SOME OTHER STUFF
Now the good stuff. The progress on our various mission experiments, etc. So here goes...
USA: 37 States and a District covered (not that we're
counting)
Canada: 1 Territory and 5 Provinces
Gert's Miles: 141,000 (27,000 with us)
Best Pancakes (so far): hmmm. Carson Hot Springs WA (with a
notable at Noshville, Nashville TN).
As an aside to the pancake experiment a new wonder drug has just been released in the US. Called Xenical, it's a fat blocker and will help me get back to fighting weight before returning to the UK and commencing my "stay thin swimming regimen with Tina" thing. Its only noticable side effect is (and I quote) "Gas with Oily Discharge" so as long as I don't have it immediately before entering the pool all should be well.
Mike's No Haircut in North America Experiment: hair below nose at front, ponytailable at back, and fetching ringlets have now developed behind both ears. The curls have come as quite a surprise.
Both very well, and heading south through Mississippi to New Orleans. We look forward to hearing your news.
Love, Michael and Jose.
Dear all,
Yeah well, so much for writing more frequently and keeping notes as I go along.
Jose tells me that the last email to "the rabble" was done in Memphis in November of last year, which is really slack.
We are currently in Alberkerkee (my spelling may be a bit off), New Mexico and are finishing our year by driving a section of the Mother Road/Route 66.
Between Memphis and here we have been to (with some highlights)...
Missouri
St Louis (pronounced Lewis) and up the Jefferson Expansion National Monument (apparently he put on a bit of weight in his later years - or is that Taft). Anyway it's a huge stainless steel arch that you think will be pants on the way as you read about it, but is actually pretty amazing.
Arkansas
Bill Clinton's home state. We didn't make it to Hope ("There will always be a place called Hope") but we did go to Hot Springs to see a very disfigured bust of him atop the Welcome to Hot Springs sign. In Little Rock there is a bust of him in the Governor's Mansion with a yellow ribbon tied VERY tightly round his neck. Do they want him home, or are they stringing him up. As an aside, Arkansas officially has the worst roads in the US.
Mississippi
Drove the Delta road. The poverty in Mississippi is very disturbing. At times it was hard to believe that this is the same country that contains a city like New York.
Louisiana
New Orleans and the plantations were the highlight. NO would be a great weekend trip for any of you new New Yorkers out there.
Alabama
Civil Rights all the way. A really disturbing museum in Birmingham. Also one of our nicest experiences. We attended a service in MLK's old baptist church in Montgomery on what turned out to be it's 122nd anniversary. They had flown a preacher down from Ohio to speak to the congregation. Neither of us had heard anything like it. He spoke for about 90 minutes and the time just flew. Can you imagine a CofE vicar talking for 90 minutes!! Jose and I were the only two white faces in the place, and the number of people that came up to us at the end and shook our hands and thanked us for coming was quite incredible. There are obviouly a lot of problems in the South, but there is also something very special about it.
Georgia
Stayed with the Kissane family in Athens for a couple of nights, it was nice to be in a family atmosphere again. Also visited Savannah. Beautiful city although the weather was a bit ropey. Andersonville, an old Confederate prison camp, now contains the National POW museum. Very moving too - if you like that sort of thing.
South Carolina
Charleston, like Savannah was beautiful, and like Savannah the weather was miserable.
Florida
Before we went we were a bit suspicious of Florida - bit of a Brits on holiday winter sun destination. There were LOTS of Brits but there was a lot more too. St Augustine, the oldest continually occupied site in the US (forgive us Anasazi); the Kennedy Space Center was fun; Miami Beach was great architecturally (ooh, get me), and had one of the most disturbing holocaust memorials I have ever seen, there were also some girls in bikinis - but I didn't really notice them, what with the Art Deco n'all. The Everglades at New Year was fun. Hardly any people there, so it was just us and the 'gators and the mosquitos. I woke one morning and did a count of them on the inside of our flysheet. At peak we had 6.24 per square inch. I used to send Jose out to clear the way first. Had another lovely family experience with the Patton's in Pensacola where we gave some tea making courses for beginners. I don't think anyone was too impressed.
Texas
Makes it into our top three states (along with Alaska and Virginia). From Jefferson in the NE where a lovely volunteer in the visitor center gave us a walking tour guide to the town and then immediately told us that it was "too far to walk". The Rangerette museum in <TexasTownHere> - lots of young girls in short skirts doing high kicks - do you sense a pattern. Waco, and the Branch Davidian compound, site of the infamous siege. We got out of the car to have a snoop and they set the dogs on us! Big Bend National Park, five lovely days of hiking (if hiking can be lovely) through the desert and in the mountains. We even got to spend 4 nights in an RV so our US experience must now be complete? Thanks to Marlene and Ev for (once again) looking after us.
In El Paso we attended a swearing in for new US citizens. Watched about 200 people give up any allegiance to any foriegn prince or potentate. As you can imagine in El Paso most of the people were of Mexican origin, but there was one Brit there too. They were so pleased to have a couple of foreign observers (me and Jose!) that they introduced us and we stood to tumultuous applause - the place was crawling with INS so we just prayed that they didn't check the state of our visas.
Also in Texas we had two televisual firsts. Our first State of the Union (don't worry it's still there). Apparently WJC broke all records for length. Our favourite bit was the mouthed "I Love You" to Hillary in the gallery. It had us (and every republican in the house) reaching for a bucket. We also watched our first Superbowl in a bar in Alpine, Texas. It was a great game, and even Jose was yelling for Tennessee in the closing seconds (she had had 3 of those super strength Budwiesers). Tennessee lost.
Arizona
Back to the SW to do it properly, we kind of rushed through at the start. Tucson and Phoenix were both cities in a beautiful mountain/desert seeting. Lots of prehistoric Indian sites. In Flagstaff we hit route 66 and are now heading slowly east. There are some VERY cheap motels - the kind that would give your mother appoplexy and some very cheap (but good) Mexican restaurants. As you can imagine, after a couple of weeks of non-stop enchiladas Jose is finding coming near me far less attractive than it once was.
New Mexico
Just entered the state and still heading E on 66. Western NM is beautiful and at El Morro National Monument there are inscriptions made by Spanish explorers 15 years before the Mayflower landed.
I've just had a breakfast burrito smothered in green chili, so it's time to bring this nonsense to an end. There's so much we have left out above, but rest assured we have hundreds of photos and I'm sure ya'll just can't wait to see them!
We arrive back in the UK on the morning of 11th March - which is a bit depressing, but we're looking forward to seeing everyone - if they haven't all moved to NYC.
With love,
Michael and Jose.
As always, send us you news.